The Fourth Wise Man Speaks

"Guys, what the fuck??? We said no presents! You let me walk all this way and didn't even think to mention, just once, that you had all just so happened to decide to go and bring gifts? This is such bullshit. Gold? You brought gold, Pete?!? That's just fucking fantastic. I'm going to look like an asshole. I've sweat all the way through this friggin robe, my walking stick is a piece of crap, and now you're bringing GOLD?!?! Real convenient, you just had gold lying around the manger, huh? You guys are unbelievable. I'm gonna become the Ringo Starr of this operation, no one's going to remember the guy who didn't bring a gift! What am I supposed to do when you're all standing there, giving him your fancy gold and God dammit, is that frankincense? This is going to be so fucking awkward. Jesus Christ, you guys."

Merry Christmas.