25 Fascinating Facts About Me

1) I have legs.

2) As a child, I liked candy and giggling.

3) When someone close to me dies, I cry.

4) Often, on two consecutive evenings at the conclusion of the work week, I will drink more alcohol than recommended for my body weight. I will then become inebriated, allowing me to free myself from my inhibitions and feel more comfortable in social situations that would otherwise be awkward for me.

5) I love my grandma.

6) When I'm angry, I curse.

7) My blood type contains a letter.

8) I can text message.

9) When I go out to eat at a restaurant, I will pay my bill, and then, on top of that, I will give my waiter or waitress some extra cash.

10) Before I go out for a night on the town, I put on different clothes than what I was previously wearing that day.

11) Sometimes, I will use go on the internet with no specific purpose, and let myself wander from site to site, not doing anything of actual value or productive.

12) If my body does not get water, I die.

13) I think babies and puppies are pretty cute.

14) I have many, many memories involving people with whom I grew up.

15) When I am out with my girlfriends at a bar, club, or party, I will make a fake fishy face when posing for pictures, as to make my face appear skinnier and more attractive. I think that no one has caught on to this.

16) When I'm cold, I will put on a jacket, or a blanket, depending on where I am.

17) I get sad if my own father forgets my birthday.

18) I think Europe is really just amazing.

19) I can grow hair.

20) It would be very traumatic for me to see someone get their arm bitten off by a pack of angry muskrats.

21) I like to listen to music.

22) Once, in high school, I took the SATs.

23) If I am watching TV, and all of a sudden my remote stops working, I will press all the buttons really hard. If that doesn't work, I will hit the remote a few times with the palm of my hand. If that doesn't work, I will replace the batteries.

24) I'm not a lesbian, but no, like, seriously, I would have sex with Angelina Jolie.

25) On the third Sunday of every month, I will dress up in a black-and-white striped leotard, rent a salmon colored PT cruiser from my local Budget Rent-a-Car, buy a few dozen boxes of veggie burgers from local grocer, head down Route 1 all the way to South Carolina, stopping at every McDonald's rest stop along the way, at which point I frisbee-toss a veggie burger pattie at the drive through window attendant and exclaim, "Who's the Hamburglar now, Mr. Roboto?!?" Then I listen to The Beatles, because they are my favorite band of all time.